car crash and heart attacks...

there is this weird energy going around up here lately with car crashes. its so scary. today i got in one, and almost another. i was driving to work and there was this tracker trailer with a "Wide Load" sign on it driving about 10 miles per hour, and i was super late, so i saw it pull over to the side, and thought it was letting me pass, so i start to pass and quickly realize it was starting to make a left hand turn. i was totally impatient and in the wrong 100 percent. my instant karma was that sofia was in the car with me, and she was strapped to her doggy seatbelt, but i guess i had it too loose and she went flying into the dashboard, and fell to where your feet go. she seemed okay so i kept on going.

as we are driving to work with my work buddy in his car, we hit this windy part of the road and hes going kinda fast, (i actually noticed and felt weird saying anyting, in turn lying to myself that everything was gonna be alright, to understand fully refer to my other blog post broken together) so we hit a patch of black ice and go sliding into the embankment. i had sofia on my lap and felt the car lose control and i heard the driver tell me to hold on, but time felt like molasas, it was so weird, it was like i was waiting my eminante situation. either we were gonna be cool, or i was gonna get super hurt. i just helf on to sofia super tight hoping she wouldnt go flying through the window and i just stared. no thoughts either, just stared ahead of me at what we were approaching to hit. finally impact! not too bad, could have been a lot worse. all that happend was the tire got stuck and lost air. it happend to be like 10 degrees outside, but we roughed it and luckily another worker was on his way and came by to help out. they didnt have the right tools so me and sofia went with him to work. the other guy waited for aaa to come and they hooked him up, he came to work and all was well. he drove me home, no problems.

but heres the thing. i feel weird about it in some weird way. im not sitting around thinking about it, wondering what would have happend, or what could have happend. i just feel weird from it. kinda blank. i hadnt gotten in an accident since i worked at toner in like 2000, and i got rear ended. this was my first like going head first into something. i think this is a lesson for me to start driving slower, and more carefully. i feel like everything right now is a sign. i feel like all this crazy ass shit is happening to me to teach me lessons that i need in the near future. i am trying to head all these warnings and take them seriously and keep in mind what i plan to do with my new lessons learnded. i kinda feel nausous, either from the dark room and just the computer light, or im still shook up from todays craziness. either way im out.
peace